He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Randomize
