Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Randomize
