Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
She just asked what would happen if you put a vacuum in your butt and turned it on. These are our conversations.
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
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