All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
There is something just so refreshing and wonderful about an uninterrupted morning poop in the office.
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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