Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
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