So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
tonight lets celebrate not being married
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
Randomize
