I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize
