The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
