Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize