Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
It's no shave November. This is our time.
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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