So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
Randomize
