we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
Randomize
