South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
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