when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize
