Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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