My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize