Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
I woke up on the steps beside a plate of spaghetti and a toilet paper roll ripped in half. And i actually think this day is gonna get better.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
I want a musical about memes.
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
