In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
I just crop dusted the hot FedEx guy delivering my business cards...then asked him "Was that you?" How the fuck am I allowed to be an adult?
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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