Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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