trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
he laminated a picture of his dick.
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
I was trying to chase her off the carpet, but now there are figure-eights of cat vomit. everywhere
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
I have a big to do list for you. Number 1 - me. Number 2 - drink wine 3. Talk my ears off. 4. Me again
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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