put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Randomize
