And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
nutella sex= disaster
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
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