What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
Randomize
