i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
where are my eyebrows?
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Randomize
