if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
At least I wasn't still dressed as a bottle of dom perignon when they took me to the ER
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
Randomize
