a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
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