when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
Randomize