This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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