Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
This is a mass text. Does anyone know where I am?
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
Captain Morgan didnt let me down when i stand up it feels like the world is trying to hand me rainbows.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
