No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
