we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
did i just see you in the movie theater carrying a margarita into Frozen?
All the 6 year olds are jealous of my alcohol
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
Randomize
