no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
Randomize
