"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
Randomize
