If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
