I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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