I'm lost and stupid without you.
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
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