He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Randomize
