Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
Randomize
