Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Randomize
