dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Houston, we have a blender
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Why is the toilet broken? Why did I wake up naked in the shower, hugging a bath mat? WHY IS THE TOILET BROKEN?
Is it just clogged or something?
No! There are actual chunks of toilet on the floor.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize