There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
