mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
It's blow job season.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
Randomize