WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
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