sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
Randomize
