He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
Randomize
