He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
Man, jail baloney is awful.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
im so drunk that this cat is mothering me. aggressively
Randomize