My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
