Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
It's bullshittery. It's asshattery. It's complete fuckery at its finest.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize