windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
I just had sex on a roof
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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