used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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