You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
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