did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
I just threw up a strange neon green substance. Did I eat a glow stick last night?
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
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